Beauty for Ashes

Monday, November 29, 2004

I wanted to stay 18 forever...

Well now I'm 19. So much has changed in the past year. I'm such a different person. Eighteen was the best year of my life. I can't think of a better way to end it. I spent November 27 with my friends, shooting pumkins, playing around, wrestling, it was just like old times only better. This year has brought so many changes with me moving away from home and trying to figure out what exactly home is. I find myself calling two places home. One is my parents house in Jamestown, it's been home for the past 11 years or so. The other is Hoey Residence Hall in Boone were I currently live. But neither really feels like home. I can't wait to get out of Hoey, and when I go "home" to Jamestown, my house doesn't really feel like home anymore. I can't tell what's changed, but something has. It's like that phase of my life is over, and I'm temporarily homeless. I think this is why I love Garden State so much. I've left the home of my youth and it will be some years before I establish a home of my own. So for now the words of The World You Love, by Jimmy Eat World come to mind, "I fall asleep with my friends around me, the only place I know I feel safe. I'm gonna call this home" I feel most at home when surrounded by my friends, laughing at all of their unique personality quirks, and loving them. As I was discussing Saturday night, I can't wait until this group starts to marry, the wedding receptions are gonna be crazy. I never thought I would be this blessed. My theme song for the past year has been Soco Amaretto Lime, and I really did want to stay 18 forever, but I know 19 will be wonderful because of the same people that have made 18 the best year of my life. God has taught me so much, I feel like I've changed so much in the past year, but I don't know if I have or not. God is so good, I am so blessed. I thought about typing out a huge list of people who have made this year so special, but it would be so long, and I'd forget someone. So, I'll thank Jesus, he has blessed me beyond my wildest dreams. I you all so much, and I'll be back for Christmas. I'm glad I'm 19, that's one year closer to home.

Monday, November 22, 2004

Love According To John, Paul, George, and the Ugly One (Ringo)

Well last night as I was once again sailing back to hell after a weekend in heaven, I was listening to the Beatles. I realized that the Beatles have a curious habit of being totally unenthusiastic. Perhaps this stems from their Englishness, but whatever the cause it's a bit interesting. What am I talking about? Well, most of their songs are about love, naturally, and they say things like, "she says she loves you, and you know that can't be bad", how 'bout, "she says she loves you, and that's the most wonderful thing in the world"? Then there's, "when I get home to you, I find the things that you do, they make me feel alright" and "when I get you alone you know I feel ok". I just think there could be a little more emotion in there. "I'm in love with her and I feel fine", hmm, "she's in love with me and I feel fine"? Well anyways, you get the point, and I'm not really serious at all. I love the Beatles except Ringo, and John and Yoko creep me out. This is what I think about while I'm driving by myself for hours on end. At the moment I'm procrastinating, and doing a good job. But I guess I should probably do some school work or something. Don't do anything I wouldn't do, which is any kind of work, or anything remotely difficult, stay classy, home.

Tuesday, November 16, 2004

The University's Quiet Today...

Anticipation. The upcoming weekend and Thanksgiving break are full of promise. Christmas break, a month long, also looms on the horizon. With it brings Stephen's return to NC, a house for our partying purposes, and my favorite time of year. I've been listening to the Bright Eyes Christmas Album non-stop since this weekend. Mark and Jamie came up this weekend. We had tons of fun, I laughed so hard it may have done permanent damage, It sure hurt like crazy. It was so nice to just spend time together, play checkers, watch crap on tv, and talk again. Jamie and I are making a list of Americana that we need to catch up on. I am so ready for the holidays, I've got a feeling that this is going to be, by far the best Christmas I've ever had. I'll be 19 in less than two weeks. Still not entirely sure how I feel about it. At the moment I think I'm happy about it, because that's one year closer to my future, whatever that may hold. There are so many people that I miss. I'll see you soon.

Friday, November 12, 2004

Dave's Top Ten List

A quick list of what I percieve to be my ten favorite bands of all time, in no particular order. This list is always subject to change.

Taking Back Sunday
Brand New
Thursday
Red Hot Chili Peppers
Death Cab for Cutie and The Postal Service (they're close enough to one that I'm going to count them as such)
The Shins
The Juliana Theory
Steve Miller Band
The Beetles
Pink Floyd

Not an exhaustive list by any means, because I've limited myself to ten bands because all the bands I like would take awhile to type out and I'd forget some anyways. I'm not currently listening to alot of these bands, but thats ok.

Wednesday, November 10, 2004

We were born for battle...

So it's seems that I've been letting Satan beat the crap out of me for a long time now. I guess I just got to tired to fight him and just let my hands fall to my sides. So satan's been having his way with me for awhile now, and I've just been trying to take it. I've just been trying to keep standing, but I've been dying. Last night God woke me up, and I finally realized what was happening. So for the first time in awhile I stood up to him today. So of course he's redoubled his efforts, and I seem to be in the fight of my life right now, but I can't lose. If I don't give in, I can't lose, because Satan's already been defeated, and I just have to claim that for myself.

Psalm 69
Save me O God!
For the waters have come up to my neck.
I sink in deep mire.
Where there is no standing;
I have come to deep waters,
Where the floods overflow me;
I am weary with my crying;
My throat is dry;
My eyes fail while I wait for my God...

That's me right now, but at least my eyes are open now. I can see what's really going on. But the one verse I keep coming back to is I Thessalonians 5:17 - Pray without ceasing. That's all I've been doing for the past 12 hours, I mean I've gone to class and stuff, but I havn't stopped, I can't if I stop I die.

Tuesday, November 09, 2004

Fall is Fleating

I'm slowly falling apart, I need something to get me through the night. I'll make it, I probably shouldn't blog in this state. I'm admitting defeat, I surrender, be kind. The nest thing is the best thing I hope that makes sense, although I don't understand it. I can't just forget it, he won't let me. Don't believe me when I tell you it's just what anyone would do, don't believe me when I tell you it's something unforgivable. I'm sorry for this, I don't know what's happening here, I'm losing it, I'm forgetting everything but that which must be forgotten. Best friends means I pull the trigger.

Sunday, November 07, 2004

We're the Coolest Kids, and We Take What We Can Get

Again, awesome weekend. Drove home on Thursday, saw Lauren, spent Thursday night at Jessies house. Drove to Myrtle beach Friday morning (yes I skipped class), played on the beach and swum in the Atlantic for a few hours. Then drove to barefoot landing walked around for awhile. Then it was off to The House of Blues to see Honorary Title, The Format, and Switchfoot. The show was pretty good, I'd give it about on 7. Went back to Marshalls condo for a bit, then walked back to the beach to wander around, talk on the phone, and generally be cold. Went back and fell asleep around 3am. Woke up at 7, drove back home. Went on a picnic with Lauren, was cold, cleaned some gutters, had a wonderful evening. Fell asleep at around 11pm, woke up about 12:30pm. Watched Pantnthers some, with Mark and Jamie, went and got Lauren, played some basketball, Mark made a fool of himself, and we pranked Chris Hunt. Spent a little more time with Lauren, drove back to Boone. All in all I think I spent about 16 hours driving this weekend. I know you all just wanted to here all of that, it's always depressing as mess to walk back into Hoey residence hall and smell the marijuana, and know that this is not, and never will be home. So yes this weekend was a blast, as will every weekend hence forth for as long as I can see. Happiness? Not quite, but it's the closest I've ever been.

Monday, November 01, 2004

The Dragon Flies Wings


Homecoming
Originally uploaded by Realistical.
Well this weekend saw my first high school dance, now that I'm in college. It was much like I imagined it would be, there was the obligatory bowls of punch, people standing around trying to look cool, and roaming principals. I especailly enjoyed watching the dateless guys dancing with each other in circles, it made me very, very, glad that I had a date. We sat out most of the songs on account of there being rap. They only played one white person song the whole night. Oh well, we danced to the slower R&B type stuff, then Nora Jones, and later in the parking lot we danced to Such Great Heights cover by Iron & Wine. It was a wonderful evening. The kind of evening that makes you realize how wonderfully blessed you are to be an American teenager, and how wonderful life can be. I was praying that they'd play Forever Young, but I was sadly disappointed. I encourage you all to go to at least one high school dance before you're to old. So I had an amazing weekend despite the Panthers sixth loss of the season, which I find quite stressfull. God's just been blessing me beyond my wildest dreams for the past year and he's showing no signs of letting up.